Christmas Song by James Mellick

Intro:

Just around Christmas time my spirit takes a dive

Everyone is happy, But I don't feel alive

I go to see my doctor, in need of urgent care

He shows me several ink blots shaped like underwear

Verse 1:

He tells me to close my eyes and travel back in time

I become a child again, maybe eight or nine

It is Christmas morning, year nineteen fifty-five

Everyone is excited, my spirit is alive

Richard got his bicycle, David got his skates

Larry got his toy truck, Gary got his train

Then it was my turn to open my big box

It was filled up to the top with underwear and socks.

Chorus 1:

Underwear and socks, socks and underwear

Did Santa get my letter? Did he even care?

My brothers got great toys, it really wasn't fair

All I got for Christmas was socks and underwear.

Verse 2

Then I moved ahead in time to nineteen sixty-five

My brothers were all giddy cause Christmas had arrived.

But my anticipation had quickly turned to fear

Somewhere in that pile of gifts were socks and underwear.

Richard got his pellet gun, David, his radio

Gary got his telescope and Larry got his dog

My guitar just had to be in that great big box

But joy to the world! I get to play with underwear and socks!

Chorus 2:

Underwear and socks, socks and underwear

Had Santa Claus lost his mind? This was one big error

My brothers got great presents. This was hardly fair

All I got for Christmas was socks and underwear

Bridge:

Dirty underwear is a mother's greatest fear

We see ourselves from the front, she sees us from the rear

I never had an accident requiring urgent care

But if I did, I'd surely have clean socks and underwear

Verse 3:

The doctor snapped his fingers, I'm back in present time

Said "You should count your blessings, You should stop your whining.

While children starved in China their butts were bare in Zaire

Santa gave your start in life with socks and underwear."

Finale:

A man will wear his underpants way beyond their time

The elastic goes and nothing holds on a body past it's prime

Now I don't mind some cleavage, but not seen from the rear

So all I want for Christmas are socks and underwear

Have a Very Merry 2005 Christmas

BACK TO HOME